For the 23rd year running, we present our fondest farewells to the recently departed.

If they were on any lists — or if they mattered at all in the world — you'll find them here.

If you're looking for everybody, then you need to head on over to the Directory.

Choose any date combination:      
Birgit Nilsson

84

Birgit Nilsson · 87

May 17th, 1918 - December 25th, 2005


Of all the opera singers to come out of Västra Karup in Skåne (roughly 60 miles north of Malmö), she was our favorite.

Vincent Gigante

83

Vincent Gigante · 77

March 29th, 1928 - December 19th, 2005


Nicknamed "The Chin," as in, "took it on the ...."

Jack Anderson

82

Jack Anderson · 83

October 19th, 1922 - December 17th, 2005


This guy wasn't much of a gentleman, and we don't know where the hell he was from, but he's gonna yield just the same.

William Proxmire

81

William Proxmire · 90

November 11th, 1915 - December 15th, 2005


... and so will the gentleman from Wisconsin.

Richard Pryor

80

Richard Pryor · 65

December 1st, 1940 - December 10th, 2005


His flame, finally, has gone out.

Eugene McCarthy

79

Eugene McCarthy · 89

March 29th, 1916 - December 10th, 2005


The gentleman from Minnesota will yield ...

Bud Carson

78

Bud Carson · 75

April 28th, 1930 - December 7th, 2005


That Steel Curtain was a hell of a defense, but it's not much good against emphysema.

George Best

77

George Best · 59

May 22nd, 1946 - November 25th, 2005


Northern Irish footballer. Drank a bit.

Pat Morita

76

Pat Morita · 73

June 28th, 1932 - November 24th, 2005


Wax off.

Chris Whitley

75

Chris Whitley · 45

August 31st, 1960 - November 20th, 2005


Living in big sky country.

Ralph Edwards

74

Ralph Edwards · 92

June 13th, 1913 - November 16th, 2005


This is your death.

Robert Tisch

73

Robert Tisch · 79

April 29th, 1926 - November 15th, 2005


Some rich old asshole.

Link Wray

72

Link Wray · 76

May 2nd, 1929 - November 5th, 2005


Now missing.

Skitch Henderson

71

Skitch Henderson · 87

January 27th, 1918 - November 1st, 2005


His newest generation of fans had come to know him as "Skeeyotch."

Al Lopez

70

Al Lopez · 97

August 20th, 1908 - October 30th, 2005


Jesus Christ, another million-year-old baseball player. Give us a frickin' break!

Wellington Mara

69

Wellington Mara · 89

August 14th, 1916 - October 25th, 2005


Wellington? What a fag.

Rosa Parks

68

Rosa Parks · 92

February 4th, 1913 - October 24th, 2005


End of the line, lady.

Louis Nye

67

Louis Nye · 92

May 1st, 1913 - October 9th, 2005


Hi ho, Reaperino!

Nipsey Russell

66

Nipsey Russell · 87

September 15th, 1918 - October 2nd, 2005


For years, his wit made him perfect
For game shows and talk shows and roasts
But now, TV's "Poet Laureate"
Ain't got shit to say, 'cause he's toast.

Don Adams

65

Don Adams · 82

April 13th, 1923 - September 25th, 2005


Agent 86ed.

Simon Wiesenthal

64

Simon Wiesenthal · 96

December 31st, 1908 - September 20th, 2005


Maybe now we can all stop pretending that whole Holocaust thing ever happened.

Robert Wise

63

Robert Wise · 91

September 10th, 1914 - September 14th, 2005


That's great, but he's still dead.

Chris Schenkel

62

Chris Schenkel · 82

August 21st, 1923 - September 11th, 2005


The pride of Bippus, Indiana. Doesn't exactly make you want to pack your bags, does it?

Clarence 'Gatemouth' Brown

61

Clarence 'Gatemouth' Brown · 81

April 18th, 1924 - September 10th, 2005


Truly an inspiration, Clarence became a successful musician and singer despite his horrific dental deformity.

William Rehnquist

60

William Rehnquist · 80

October 1st, 1924 - September 3rd, 2005


There goes the neighborhood ....

Bob Denver

59

Bob Denver · 70

January 9th, 1935 - September 2nd, 2005


Hard to believe this little idiot lasted as long as he did.

Barbara Geddes

58

Barbara Geddes · 82

October 31st, 1922 - August 8th, 2005


Miss Ellie just wasn't the same after J.R.'s second marriage failed, and then when she had to throw Clayton out of the house, well, you know the kind of strain that can put on a woman's heart, plus, with the boys fighting all the time...how the hell did anybody watch this crap?

Gene Mauch

57

Gene Mauch · 79

November 18th, 1925 - August 8th, 2005


Loser.

Peter Jennings

56

Peter Jennings · 67

July 29th, 1938 - August 7th, 2005


Showbiz can be screwy, sometimes, but there's a good chance that this will have a seriously negative impact on his ratings.

Little Milton

55

Little Milton · 70

September 7th, 1934 - August 4th, 2005


Even if walls could talk, Milt wouldn't hear 'em.

King Fahd

54

King Fahd · 84

March 16th, 1921 - July 31st, 2005


This was no super-model either, now that you mention it.

Pat McCormick

53

Pat McCormick · 78

June 30th, 1927 - July 29th, 2005


This was one big, ugly dude, you know that?

Hildegarde Sell

52

Hildegarde Sell · 99

February 1st, 1906 - July 29th, 2005


Gettin' hard.

John Baldry

51

John Baldry · 64

January 12th, 1941 - July 21st, 2005


He was hailed as a British blues legend, a phrase with about as much meaning as "French war hero."

James Doohan

50

James Doohan · 85

March 3rd, 1920 - July 20th, 2005


He definitely can't get any more power, Captain.

William Westmoreland

49

William Westmoreland · 91

March 26th, 1914 - July 18th, 2005


So much for that light at the end of the tunnel.

Edward Heath

48

Edward Heath · 89

July 9th, 1916 - July 17th, 2005


Ha-ha, Mr. Heath.

Geraldine Fitzgerald

47

Geraldine Fitzgerald · 91

November 24th, 1913 - July 16th, 2005


From Wuthering Heights to the smothering depths.

James Stockdale

46

James Stockdale · 81

December 23rd, 1923 - July 5th, 2005


Who was he? Why was he here?

Hank Stram

45

Hank Stram · 82

January 3rd, 1923 - July 4th, 2005


Happy Independence Day, Coach.

Luther Vandross

44

Luther Vandross · 54

April 20th, 1951 - July 1st, 2005


Not here. Not now.

Shelby Foote

43

Shelby Foote · 88

November 17th, 1916 - June 27th, 2005


All through that Civil War epic, we thought he was folksy and charming — but as soon as he showed up in the baseball thing, we hated his guts. Maybe it was the beard.

Paul Winchell

42

Paul Winchell · 82

December 21st, 1922 - June 24th, 2005


Say a prayer for the Donut King.

Cardinal Sin

41

Cardinal Sin · 76

August 31st, 1928 - June 21st, 2005


There's really nothing to add, is there?

Anne Bancroft

40

Anne Bancroft · 73

September 17th, 1931 - June 7th, 2005


And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson.

Leon Askin

39

Leon Askin · 97

September 18th, 1907 - June 3rd, 2005


Looks like they sent General Burkhalter to the Russian front.

George Mikan

38

George Mikan · 80

June 18th, 1924 - June 1st, 2005


Later, geek.

Eddie Albert

37

Eddie Albert · 99

April 22nd, 1906 - May 26th, 2005


Keep Manhattan, just give me formaldehyde.

Thurl Ravenscroft

36

Thurl Ravenscroft · 91

February 6th, 1914 - May 22nd, 2005


He's as cuddly as a cactus.

Howard Morris

35

Howard Morris · 85

September 4th, 1919 - May 21st, 2005


Uncle Goopy!!

Frank Gorshin

34

Frank Gorshin · 72

April 5th, 1933 - May 17th, 2005


Riddled with cancer.

Peter Rodino

33

Peter Rodino · 95

June 7th, 1909 - May 7th, 2005


That's gotta suck. Three more weeks and he would've found out who Deep Throat was.

John Mills

32

John Mills · 97

February 22nd, 1908 - April 23rd, 2005


Sir John Mills, right? British guy?
We got nothin'.

John Fred

31

John Fred · 63

May 8th, 1941 - April 15th, 2005


Johnny's in disguise (as ashes).

Prince Rainier

30

Prince Rainier · 81

May 31st, 1923 - April 6th, 2005


No offense, Your Highness, but your beer SUCKS.

Saul Bellow

29

Saul Bellow · 89

June 10th, 1915 - April 5th, 2005


Six feet bellow, to be exact.

Pope John Paul II

28

Pope John Paul II · 84

May 18th, 1920 - April 2nd, 2005


Sic transit gloria mundi.

Frank Perdue

27

Frank Perdue · 84

May 9th, 1920 - March 31st, 2005


A man named Perdue, who sold chicken
Did so well, it would make your heart quicken
For six decades old Frank
Clucked his way to the bank
'Til the day that his own heart stopped tickin'

Johnnie Cochran

26

Johnnie Cochran · 67

October 2nd, 1937 - March 29th, 2005


If he doesn't breathe, you must bereave.

Howell Heflin

25

Howell Heflin · 83

June 19th, 1921 - March 29th, 2005


He put the "scum" in "Tuscumbia, Alabama".

Rod Price

24

Rod Price · 57

November 22nd, 1947 - March 22nd, 2005


What more fitting send-off can we possibly give to the lead guitarist for Foghat than "Take it easy (arreear-neearr dahna danahna)"?

Bobby Short

23

Bobby Short · 80

September 15th, 1924 - March 21st, 2005


Bobby dead, too.

John DeLorean

22

John DeLorean · 80

January 6th, 1925 - March 19th, 2005


Any truth to the rumor that his coffin features a gull-wing lid?

George Kennan

21

George Kennan · 101

February 16th, 1904 - March 17th, 2005


This guy predicted Russki trouble way before anyone else, and he was great in Airport '79.

Hans Bethe

20

Hans Bethe · 98

July 2nd, 1906 - March 6th, 2005


Pronounced like "beta." We'll let you draw your own conclusions.

Martin Denny

19

Martin Denny · 93

April 10th, 1911 - March 2nd, 2005


That village is getting quieter all the time, huh, Marty?

Harry Simeone

18

Harry Simeone · 93

May 9th, 1911 - February 22nd, 2005


No, dude, we definitely do not hear what you hear.

Gene Scott

17

Gene Scott · 75

August 14th, 1929 - February 21st, 2005


This guy was the greatest. Unlike any other televangelist, he came across as a psycho college professor, unkempt and ranting, possibly on drugs. Sometimes he played sax. Once, when he was upset about the paucity of donations, we watched him smoke an entire cigar, without saying a word, for twenty minutes. This was late-night UHF programming at its most riveting, folks, and Dr. Gene will be missed.

John Raitt

16

John Raitt · 88

January 29th, 1917 - February 20th, 2005


Are you ready for a thing called death?

Hunter S. Thompson

15

Hunter S. Thompson · 67

July 18th, 1937 - February 20th, 2005


Looks like his loathing finally overcame his fear.

Sandra Dee

14

Sandra Dee · 62

April 23rd, 1942 - February 20th, 2005


Gidget goes to Hell.

Arthur Miller

13

Arthur Miller · 89

October 17th, 1915 - February 10th, 2005


Death of a playwright, who just happens to have spent five years boning Marilyn Monroe.

Jimmy Smith

12

Jimmy Smith · 76

December 8th, 1928 - February 8th, 2005


Organ player ... uh ... organ donor ... uh ... something with organs ....

Ossie Davis

11

Ossie Davis · 87

December 18th, 1917 - February 4th, 2005


Ossie ya later.

Max Schmeling

10

Max Schmeling · 99

September 28th, 1905 - February 2nd, 2005


Acht ... Neun ... Zehn ... AUS!

John Vernon

9

John Vernon · 72

February 24th, 1932 - February 1st, 2005


In the words of former U.S. Senator John 'Bluto' Blutarsky, "Wormer? He's a dead man!"

Philip Johnson

8

Philip Johnson · 98

July 8th, 1906 - January 25th, 2005


Design flaw.

Johnny Carson

7

Johnny Carson · 79

October 23rd, 1925 - January 23rd, 2005


He-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-ere's eternity!

Rose Woods

6

Rose Woods · 87

December 26th, 1917 - January 22nd, 2005


The truth finally comes out, now that she's gone, that Nixon
                               &n

Virginia Mayo

5

Virginia Mayo · 84

November 30th, 1920 - January 17th, 2005


Held.

Ruth Warrick

4

Ruth Warrick · 89

June 29th, 1915 - January 15th, 2005


She was a daytime soap opera star.

Rosemary Kennedy

3

Rosemary Kennedy · 86

September 13th, 1918 - January 7th, 2005


Guess we were about due for another one of these.

Danny Sugerman

2

Danny Sugerman · 50

October 11th, 1954 - January 5th, 2005


Broke on through.

Shirley Chisholm

1

Shirley Chisholm · 80

November 30th, 1924 - January 2nd, 2005


Happy trails, Shirl.

 

 

Guess the Stiff!

Ernest goes to mulch. Know what I mean, Vern?

(d) February 10th, 2000