For the 23rd year running, we present our fondest farewells to the recently departed.

If they were on any lists — or if they mattered at all in the world — you'll find them here.

If you're looking for everybody, then you need to head on over to the Directory.

Choose any date combination:      
Carl Sagan

63

Carl Sagan · 62

November 9th, 1934 - December 20th, 1996


There are billions and billions of gags we could have written about him, but they're all the same one.

Eadie Del Rubio

62

Eadie Del Rubio · 75

August 23rd, 1921 - December 16th, 1996


You haven't lived until you've heard The Del Rubio Triplets' version of "El Condor Pasa."

Mary Leakey

61

Mary Leakey · 83

February 6th, 1913 - December 9th, 1996


Night night, monkey lady.

Mario Savio

60

Mario Savio · 53

December 8th, 1942 - November 6th, 1996


He was the heart of the Berkeley free speech movement. Well, he had heart trouble, and now he's entirely free of both speech and movement.

Marcel Carne

59

Marcel Carne · 90

August 18th, 1906 - October 31st, 1996


He directed Les Enfants Du Paradis, and now he's one of them.

Morey Amsterdam

58

Morey Amsterdam · 87

December 14th, 1908 - October 28th, 1996


The Human Croak Machine.

57

David Viscott

October 14th, 1996


The doctor is out.

56

Rene Lacoste

October 12th, 1996


See you later, alligator.

55

Ted Bessell

October 6th, 1996


That Girl's ex-boyfriend, emphasis on the x.

54

Dorothy Lamour

September 22nd, 1996


She's on the road to nowhere.

Spiro Agnew

53

Spiro Agnew · 77

November 9th, 1918 - September 17th, 1996


The shock of his death was universal. No one seemed to know that he was still alive.

52

McGeorge Bundy

September 16th, 1996


Just another dead politician.

Juliet Prowse

51

Juliet Prowse · 59

September 25th, 1936 - September 14th, 1996


She was the acrobatic dancer with pancreatic cancer.

Tupac Shakur

50

Tupac Shakur · 25

June 16th, 1971 - September 13th, 1996


What's Tupac spelled backwards?

Joanne Dru

49

Joanne Dru · 74

January 31st, 1922 - September 10th, 1996


She wore a yellow ribbon. Now she's dead.

Bill Monroe

48

Bill Monroe · 84

September 13th, 1911 - September 9th, 1996


That high lonesome sound just got a little higher and a lot more lonesome.

Greg Morris

47

Greg Morris · 62

September 27th, 1933 - August 27th, 1996


The movie version of Mission: Impossible was painful to us. Looks like it was fatal to him.

Tom Mees

46

Tom Mees · 46

October 13th, 1949 - August 14th, 1996


Excellent Swimmer? Perhaps Not.

45

Claudette Colbert

July 30th, 1996


It happened one night in July.

Virginia Christine

44

Virginia Christine · 76

March 5th, 1920 - July 24th, 1996


It may be mountain grown, Mrs. Olsen, and that may well be the richest kind, but if you drink enough of it, it'll kill you, as we guess you're now aware.

43

Jessica Mitford

July 23rd, 1996


In 1963, she authored The American Way Of Death. So, Jessica, what too

42

Herb Edelman

July 21st, 1996


One of the poker buddies from The Odd Couple. Stay away from the brown sandwiches.

Chas Chandler

41

Chas Chandler · 57

December 18th, 1938 - July 17th, 1996


If there's a rock 'n' roll heaven, then you know they got a hell of a band, except for the bass player.

John Chancellor

40

John Chancellor · 68

July 14th, 1927 - July 12th, 1996


Somewhere in custody.

39

Melvin Belli

July 9th, 1996


Lawyer.

Margaux Hemingway

38

Margaux Hemingway · 42

February 16th, 1954 - July 1st, 1996


Closet Karen Carpenter fan, right to the end.

Pamela Mason

37

Pamela Mason · 80

March 10th, 1916 - June 29th, 1996


Here's a weird one. She had her own TV show, and was in no fewer than four films as herself, and yet, until she died, we'd never heard of her.

Albert Broccoli

36

Albert Broccoli · 87

April 5th, 1909 - June 27th, 1996


Just as well. It's awful to think of anyone spending the rest of his days as a vegetable.

35

Andreas Papandreou

June 23rd, 1996


As it turns out, this long-time leader was pretty cool, for a Greek.

Ella Fitzgerald

34

Ella Fitzgerald · 79

April 25th, 1917 - June 15th, 1996


A tisket, a tasket, they put her in a casket ....

33

Jo Fleet

June 10th, 1996


Kate is now way east of Eden.

Max Factor

32

Max Factor · 91

August 18th, 1904 - June 7th, 1996


Turned in, tuned out, dropped dead.

Timothy Leary

31

Timothy Leary · 75

October 22nd, 1920 - May 31st, 1996


Turned in, tuned out, dropped dead.

Johnny

30

Johnny "Guitar" Watson · 61

February 3rd, 1935 - May 17th, 1996


The axe has fallen.

Lee Mathis

29

Lee Mathis · 44

March 10th, 1952 - May 1st, 1996


We never heard of him either, but Julie swears he was a big soap opera star.

28

William Colby

April 27th, 1996


It further tests our dwindling faith in government that the former head of the CIA can't paddle a canoe without drowning.

Erma Bombeck

27

Erma Bombeck · 69

February 21st, 1927 - April 22nd, 1996


The grass is greener still in the cemetery.

26

Jimmy Snyder

April 21st, 1996


Here's where we make our case for euthanasia.

25

Greer Garson

April 6th, 1996


Goodbye, Mrs. Chips.

24

Whit Bissel

April 5th, 1996


Character actor who made a fortune in the carpet sweeper business.

John McSherry

23

John McSherry · 51

September 11th, 1944 - April 1st, 1996


Through the magic of videotape, he gave us solid evidence that the bigger they come, the harder they fall.

Edmund Muskie

22

Edmund Muskie · 81

March 28th, 1914 - March 26th, 1996


He was a big fish in a little state.

Krzysztof Kieslowski

21

Krzysztof Kieslowski · 54

June 27th, 1941 - March 13th, 1996


Blue. White. Red. Now. He's. Dead.

Vince Edwards

20

Vince Edwards · 67

July 9th, 1928 - March 11th, 1996


Ben Casey has struck out.

George Burns

19

George Burns · 100

December 31, 1896 - March 9th, 1996


The granddaddy of 'em all, G.B. appeared on more Dead Pool lists than any other celebrity in history. We understand he was once famous for something other than being old.

Minnie Pearl

18

Minnie Pearl · 83

October 25th, 1912 - March 4th, 1996


The world was her oyster.

Marguerite Duras

17

Marguerite Duras · 81

April 4th, 1914 - March 3rd, 1996


Maggie D was one of France's most famed and prolific writers, but she never had a TV show, so you probably never heard of her.

Haing Ngor

16

Haing Ngor · 55

March 22nd, 1940 - February 25th, 1996


He survived the killing fields of Cambodia, but they got him on the streets of L.A.

Morton Gould

15

Morton Gould · 82

December 10th, 1913 - February 21st, 1996


Modern decomposer.

Charlie Finley

14

Charlie Finley · 77

February 22nd, 1918 - February 19th, 1996


For his part in bringing the designated hitter to Major League Baseball, may he burn in hell. Bitter? You bet we are.

Brownie McGhee

13

Brownie McGhee · 80

November 30th, 1915 - February 16th, 1996


Oh, fudge, Brownie's dead.

Edmund G.

12

Edmund G. "Pat" Brown · 90

April 21st, 1905 - February 16th, 1996


How do you get Pat out of Edmund?

Roger Bowen

11

Roger Bowen · 63

May 25th, 1932 - February 16th, 1996


He met his maker one day after McLean Stevenson met his. Must've been Bump Henry Blake Week.

McLean Stevenson

10

McLean Stevenson · 68

November 14th, 1927 - February 15th, 1996


Goodbye, Larry.

Tommy Rettig

9

Tommy Rettig · 54

December 10th, 1941 - February 15th, 1996


The first in a series of child-actors who played second fiddle to a dog.

Martin Balsam

8

Martin Balsam · 76

November 4th, 1919 - February 13th, 1996


You'd know him if you saw him, really you would.

Guy Madison

7

Guy Madison · 74

January 19th, 1922 - February 6th, 1996


A friend of ours mourned his recent passing, saying how much he'd idolized him on Lost In Space. Touching, except that it was Guy Williams who was on Lost In Space.

Audrey Meadows

6

Audrey Meadows · 73

February 8th, 1922 - February 3rd, 1996


Pow, right in the kisser.

Shamus Culhane

5

Shamus Culhane · 87

November 12th, 1908 - February 2nd, 1996


Pioneering animator of Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs fame. In his later years, he came to be known as "Coughie."

Gene Kelly

4

Gene Kelly · 83

August 23rd, 1912 - February 2nd, 1996


Didn't anyone ever tell him if he didn't come in out of the rain he'd catch his death?

Les Baxter

3

Les Baxter · 73

March 14th, 1922 - January 15th, 1996


In fact, there's a lot less Baxter, now that you mention it.

Minnesota Fats

2

Minnesota Fats · 82

January 19th, 1913 - January 15th, 1996


An octogenarian that goes by the name "Fats" - how did we miss this one? It's downright embarrassing.

Chubby Wise

1

Chubby Wise · 80

October 2nd, 1915 - January 6th, 1996


Actually, he was neither.

 

 

Guess the Stiff!

Man, that's not even close.

(d) September 15th, 1989