Newest Stiffs:

  • Bernie Madoff

    Bernie Madoff · 82

    April 29th, 1938 — April 14th, 2021

    The thing about pyramids is that there’s *always* a little prick at the top.


  • Prince Philip

    Prince Philip · 99

    June 10th, 1921 — April 9th, 2021

    Well, well, well. Looks like QE2 is on the market again, fellas.


  • Beverly Cleary

    Beverly Cleary · 104

    April 12th, 1916 — March 25th, 2021

    She was a beloved author who inspired tens of millions of children to read. Her biggest scandal was - gasp! - marrying a Roman Catholic in 1940. YOU try to think of a witty obituary, smartass.


  • George Segal

    George Segal · 87

    February 13th, 1934 — March 23rd, 2021

    Yet another highly-acclaimed Jewish banjo-playing actor passes away.


  • Yaphet Kotto

    Yaphet Kotto · 81

    November 15th, 1939 — March 15th, 2021

    As Dr. Kananga, he had one of the best Bond villain deaths ever. In real life, probably less dramatic.


Today's Celebrity Birthdays:

  • Enrique Iglesias

    Enrique Iglesias · 46

    (b) May 8th, 1975


  • John Fred

    John Fred

    would have been 80 today
    May 8th, 1941 — April 15th, 2005

    Johnny's in disguise (as ashes).

  • David Attenborough

    David Attenborough · 95

    (b) May 8th, 1926


  • Don Rickles

    Don Rickles

    would have been 95 today
    May 8th, 1926 — April 6th, 2017

    Who's the hockey puck now?

  • Red Hoff

    Red Hoff

    would have been 130 today
    May 8, 1891 — September 17th, 1998

    He claimed to have struck out Ty Cobb once. Makes a nice story, except that he also claimed to have discovered Jupiter.

Today's Celebrity Deaths:

  • Roy Horn

    Roy Horn · 75

    died 1 year ago today
    October 3rd, 1944 — May 8th, 2020

    He always blamed himself for getting mauled onstage by a tiger. In his defense, everyone else blamed him, too.

  • George Deukmejian

    George Deukmejian · 89

    died 3 years ago today
    June 6th, 1928 — May 8th, 2018

    The Duke. Another politician with no scandals section, so we can't write anything funny or insulting about him. Good news: in a few years, THAT will not be a problem.

  • William Schallert

    William Schallert · 93

    died 5 years ago today
    July 6th, 1922 — May 8th, 2016

    IMDB has him at 374 acting credits up until 2014, then NOTHING. Slacker.

  • Maurice Sendak

    Maurice Sendak · 83

    died 9 years ago today
    June 10th, 1928 — May 8th, 2012

    Maurice roared his terrible roar and gnashed his terrible teeth and rolled his terrible eyes and showed his terrible claws- till Max said "BE STILL!"

  • Dom DiMaggio

    Dom DiMaggio · 92

    died 12 years ago today
    February 12th, 1917 — May 8th, 2009

    Looks like that 33,597 day breathing streak is over.

  • Eddy Arnold

    Eddy Arnold · 89

    died 13 years ago today
    May 15th, 1918 — May 8th, 2008

    He sang "Make The World Go Away" in 1965, and finally got his wish in 2008.

  • Dana Plato

    Dana Plato · 34

    died 22 years ago today
    November 7th, 1964 — May 8th, 1999

    She was on Howard Stern to try and jumpstart her career, and then ODed about 12 hours later, which seems somewhat counter-productive.

  • Dirk Bogarde

    Dirk Bogarde · 78

    died 22 years ago today
    March 28th, 1921 — May 8th, 1999

    The star of "Death In Venice" has apparently bought it in London.

The Lee Atwater Invitational Dead Pool

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The 2021 Lee Atwater Invitational Dead Pool Leaderboard

Here are the ten lists in the lead for the current game …

 StiffsScore
1.Death Race 2021848
2.Deathriderfreebie745
3.Zsigmond Follies744
4.Cemetery Girls 3743
5.Figureeighter742
6.Death's Doorstep 3740
7.Mbalmed 1641
8.Mbalmed 3641
9.Spitting Up Blood641
10.Deathrider2021640
 

 

Guess the Stiff!

He was an old, old, old, old man.

(d) February 19th, 2001