Head of the Florida Citrus Commission from 1969 - 1980. We think she also made some records or something.

Out of time.

Diane doesn't live here anymore.

White House Chief of Staff, Secretary of Defense, Vice President - and all we remember is when he shot that dude in the face while hunting.

Started with A Christmas Carol and All This, and Heaven Too and finished with Zombie Hamlet and Bongee Bear and the Kingdom of Rhythm. Solid.

Abracadabra this, you tie-dyed, buck-toothed, shaggy-headed freak.

His brother was a sports announcer.

Businessman. Libertarian. Philanthropist. Engineer. Dick.

Hard to bill yourself as a bad-ass terrorist when you wear a Santa hat every day of your life. Dummy.

Things he invented:

Chop-O-Matic (for chopping food, which was apparently WAY too hard)
Veg-O-Matic (same thing, but for slicing veggies)
Pocket Fisherman (so you can carry a fishing pole everywhere you go)
Mr. Microphone (apparently for assaulting hot women on the street)
Inside the shell egg scrambler (yes, seriously)
Showtime Rotisserie (like a regular rotisserie, but smaller)
GLH-9 - Hair in a Spray Can (Yes. Hair. In a can.)
Drain Buster (No idea.)
Smokeless Ashtray (Ashtray with a fan. Where did the smoke go?)
Electric Food Dehydrator (For sucking both moisture and flavor out of foods)
Automatic Pasta Maker (NOT automatic, we promise)
Rhinestone Stud Setter (Bedazzling before the bedazzler)
The Cap Snaffler (a bottle opener)

This is where the definition of "celebrity" gets very hazy.

He won the National Cartoonists Society Medal of Honor, which we assume means you got shot while drawing a cartoon or something. Too hungover to look it up. Lets go with that.

Where have all the folkies gone?

Great Caesar's ghost!

Red, green - whatever. As long as it's a grave.

Que Schirra, Schirra.

If he only coulds.

He's doing that real slow shuffle.

Cardinal O'Connor's an ecclesiastic goner.

How does four home runs and a double in one game grab you?