Died October 28, 2026 · Age 95
Barbara Barrie
Nominated for an Oscar, a Tony and three Emmys, and lost every single one. Death is the first time anybody opened the envelope and actually read her name.
51 stiffs · 2026
The Stiffs
For the 32nd year running, our fondest farewells to the recently departed. If they were on anybody’s list, or mattered at all, they’re here. Looking for everybody? Try the Directory.
Died October 28, 2026 · Age 86
Patrick Stewart
Did sixty years of Shakespeare, and the world only noticed once he put on space pajamas as Captain Picard. Finally beamed up for good.
Died October 26, 2026 · Age 80
Susan Saint James
Played the "Wife" in McMillan & Wife, billed behind a man and an ampersand. She finally gets her name first, on the headstone.
Died October 25, 2026 · Age 90
Walter Koenig
NBC hired him in 1967 because they wanted a Davy Jones lookalike to snag the teenage girls, then slapped a Monkees wig on him to close the deal. He spent the next six decades insisting everything was invented in Russia, survived a space eel crawling into his ear in Wrath of Khan, and asked half of San Francisco for directions to the “nuclear wessels.” Shatner and Takei are the last two standing. Place your bets.
Died October 21, 2026 · Age 93
Tom Skerritt
As Captain Dallas in Alien, he responded to a monster with acid for blood by personally crawling into an air duct after it — the kind of leadership that gets you eaten in the second act. He outlived that decision by 47 years. Then he was Viper in Top Gun, the only man in the movie who kept his shirt on for volleyball. He also won an Emmy for Picket Fences, which nobody under 50 can describe. The Reaper finally got a tone on him. Fox two.
Died October 6, 2026 · Age 102
Eva Saint
Spent years as Hollywood's oldest living Oscar winner, which made every In Memoriam reel a nail-biter. Now the Saint thing is finally official.
Died October 6, 2026 · Age 102
Eva Saint
Started her career in On the Waterfront and made it to 102. Took her long enough. Kudos to the 104 players who stayed patient.
Died October 5, 2026 · Age 86
Jim Bakker
Ran PTL, built a Christian water park, stole millions from his flock, went to prison, then sold buckets of doomsday food on TV. Jim's finally in the end times.
Died October 3, 2026 · Age 84
Dennis Hastert
Longest-serving Republican speaker in history, and that's somehow the second-worst thing on his record. Once third in line for the presidency, now first in line for Hell.
Died October 3, 2026 · Age 84
Dennis Hastert
The longest-serving Republican Speaker of the House turned out to have been a high school wrestling coach in the worst possible way. Pinned at last.
Died September 14, 2026 · Age 88
Peter Max
Painted every rainbow-colored poster in your parents' house in 1968. Finally tripped all the way out.
Died September 2, 2026 · Age 92
Gloria Steinem
A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. And everybody needs a coffin, eventually.
Died August 27, 2026 · Age 83
Ratko Mladic
"The Butcher of Bosnia" spent his last years in a cell in The Hague. And now he's in a smaller cell. Rot.
Died August 25, 2026 · Age 80
Dolly Parton
9 to 5 is over. Not one person on this website is happy about this one, and we're the assholes. Just a legend.
Died August 24, 2026 · Age 94
Jaye Morgan
Gong Show judge, flashed her breasts on national TV and got permanently banned from NBC. Finally got her gong.
Died August 22, 2026 · Age 82
Shelley Fabares
Johnny Angel, how she loved him. Lived happily ever after with Coach. Not so happily now.
Died August 20, 2026 · Age 92
Nancy Kissinger
Married Henry Kissinger, choked a protester at an airport, and outlived him by three years. The marriage was the war crime.
Died August 16, 2026 · Age 36
Hayden Panettiere
"Save the cheerleader, save the world." Nobody saved the cheerleader.
Died August 9, 2026 · Age 86
Don Nelson
Won five championships as a Celtic and then coached 31 years in the NBA without winning a single one. Nellie Ball has fouled out.
Died July 13, 2026 · Age 78
Sam Neill
Ran from dinosaurs in Jurassic Park. The dinosaurs, finally, have won.
Died July 11, 2026 · Age 71
Lindsey Graham
Spent 20 years in the Senate trying to start a war somewhere. Death beat him to the punch.
Died July 8, 2026 · Age 75
Bonnie Tyler
She was holding out for a hero. The hero did not arrive in time.
Died July 6, 2026 · Age 87
Louise Lasser
Played Mary Hartman, was married to Woody Allen, and was arrested for not paying for a $35 doll. Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman - Mary Hartman's dead.
Died June 22, 2026 · Age 94
Clive Davis
Discovered Janis Joplin, Bruce Springsteen, Whitney Houston and Alicia Keys. Arista Records is going to need a new man to stand next to the talent at the Grammys.
Died June 22, 2026 · Age 100
Alan Greenspan
Said the market had "irrational exuberance" in 1996, then watched it go up for four more years. Finally made a call that stuck.
Died June 12, 2026 · Age 100
Gene Shalit
Movie critic, pun machine, and owner of a mustache that had its own zip code. Two thumbs way, way down.
Died June 6, 2026 · Age 93
Bob Packwood
Resigned from the Senate after 29 women accused him of sexual harassment, and when they asked for his diaries, he edited them. He can't edit this one.
Died May 26, 2026 · Age 68
Bob Horner
Hit four home runs in one game for the Braves, then went to Japan and became a god. Back to being mortal now.
Died May 25, 2026 · Age 95
Sonny Rollins
Took sabbaticals from jazz to practice his saxophone alone on the Williamsburg Bridge. The bridge would like everyone to know it finally has some peace and quiet.
Died May 21, 2026 · Age 41
Kyle Busch
Two Cup Series titles, and he was the most hated man in NASCAR for 20 years running. Rowdy finally crossed the line for the last time.
Died May 19, 2026 · Age 86
Barney Frank
Ran a gay escort service out of his apartment - allegedly without knowing - and then wrote Dodd-Frank. Sort of a theme: other people's money.
Died May 12, 2026 · Age 87
Rex Reed
Spent sixty years telling us which movies sucked. His review of the afterlife: "Derivative."
Died May 9, 2026 · Age 84
Bobby Cox
Got ejected from more games than any manager in baseball history. This time he finally stays out.
Died May 6, 2026 · Age 87
Ted Turner
Founded CNN, owned the Braves, married Jane Fonda, and owned more land than anybody else in America. Mouth of the South - shut at last.
Died April 8, 2026 · Age 80
Davey Lopes
Stole 557 bases and won a World Series with the Dodgers. Got thrown out at home.
Died March 23, 2026 · Age 82
Valerie Perrine
Played Miss Teschmacher in Superman and posed for Playboy, and the Playboy pictures were a lot more popular.
Died March 19, 2026 · Age 86
Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris doesn't die. Death dies, and then Chuck Norris shows up at its funeral. ...Hold on, we're getting word this was not, in fact, the case.
Died March 4, 2026 · Age 89
Lou Holtz
Coached Notre Dame to a national title, then spent 30 years on ESPN lisping at college students. Death has finally given Lou a halftime speech.
Died February 28, 2026 · Age 86
Ayatollah Khamenei
For 37 years he ran Iran as its Supreme Leader, a job title that tells you everything about his management style. He decided what women could wear on their heads, what everyone could say online and who went to prison for disagreeing, then relaxed by leading crowds in chants of “Death to America.” After enough repetitions, America took it as an RSVP. Iran declared 40 days of mourning, which is still more fun than anything he allowed while he was alive.
Died February 27, 2026 · Age 87
Bo Gritz
The real-life inspiration for John Rambo spent his retirement selling survivalist courses and running for president on the Populist ticket. First Blood, last breath.
Died February 20, 2026 · Age 89
Bill Mazeroski
Hit the only Game 7 walk-off home run in World Series history. Nobody in Pittsburgh has had a reason to celebrate since.
Died February 19, 2026 · Age 53
Eric Dane
McSteamy is now McStiffy. ALS is a rotten way to go, and Eric was way too young for it.
Died February 17, 2026 · Age 84
Jesse Jackson
Ran for president twice, fathered a love child, and called New York "Hymietown". The Reverend has finally kept hope alive... somewhere else.
Died February 15, 2026 · Age 95
Robert Duvall
"I love the smell of napalm in the morning." The morning, sadly, has now passed.
Died February 11, 2026 · Age 48
James Van Der Beek
Dawson's creek has finally run dry. Way too damn soon, and we are not laughing at this one.
Died February 3, 2026 · Age 53
Saif Gaddafi
Spent most of his life as heir to the Libyan dictatorship, the rest dodging the people who wanted the heir dead. They won.
Died January 23, 2026 · Age 90
John Brodie
Played 17 seasons as quarterback for the 49ers without winning a thing, then became a pro golfer. San Francisco says he was very consistent.
Died January 19, 2026 · Age 93
Valentino Garavani
He spent sixty years putting the world’s richest women in red dresses so expensive they came with their own security detail. He dressed Jackie Kennedy to marry a Greek shipping tycoon, Julia Roberts to collect her Oscar and every princess with a trust fund in between, all while maintaining a tan the color of a very expensive handbag. He died at home in Rome. Somewhere a pug in a monogrammed sweater is wondering who pays for dinner now.
Died January 10, 2026 · Age 78
Bob Weir
The Grateful Dead's rhythm guitarist had a long, strange trip. Bobby is now fully Grateful.