Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named Bud,
Ninety-five and happy as a hog in the mud,
And then one day, he was chewin' on some food,
And in through the door come The Adios Dude.
Death, that is ...
Black Knight ...
Mr. D ....
Well, the first thing you know,
Bud's cryin' like a girl,
Death said, "You're the biggest pussy in the world."
Said, "Purgatory is the place you ought to be,"
So he pulled out his plug, and Buddy drew a Z.
Died, that is ...
Screwed the pooch ...
Bought the farm ....
Won't come back, now ... y'hea'
He was the manager-husband of Carol Channing, who recently sued him for divorce. She claimed, among other things, that they had had sex a total of twice in 40 years. We've been wondering what made him do it the second time.
(d) September 2nd, 1999