We really dug deep to find the nicest possible thing to say about this guy, so here it is:
He was a COMPLETE sack of SHIT.
A distant relative of John Q. Customer, Mr. Service had been ailing for some time. He is survived by wife Cybil and estranged nephews Bud J. Etcuts and Ed Vertisingexpenses.
(d) February 3rd, 1999