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This list was submitted by Futzer on Tuesday, December 31st, 2013 at 10:04 AM PST for The 2014 Lee Atwater Invitational Dead Pool.

Points Celebrity Date of Death Age 
10William ShatnerAlive87
9Casey Kasem June 15th, 201482
8 Zsa Zsa GaborDecember 18th, 201699
7Justin BieberAlive24
6Ronnie WoodAlive?
5George H.W. BushAlive94
4Ed AsnerAlive88
3Stan LeeAlive95
2Eli Wallach June 24th, 201498
1Kirk DouglasAlive101
11 points 2 hits 
 

 

Guess the Stiff!

The 58th richest American now takes his rightful place in history as a sticky blob on the underside of capitalism's theatre seat. Ever try to get those things off after a couple days? No, you probably never even thought about it. You're one of those people that just takes that gooey sucker right out of your mouth, whenever you get tired of it, and slaps it under the nearest available piece of furniture. Hey, it's dark, why not? Never mind that some poor slob who's worried about the price of a rebuilt alternator is gonna spend a half-hour trying to chisel that melanoma-like mouthful of chemicals off without damaging the fucking wood. Ever wonder why we have carjackings, you filthy, stupid, rich pig bastard?! What's that? Another one of you thoughtless bloodsuckers blew a gasket? Well, right on, baby! Right on!!

(d) March 8th, 1999